The Weight of the World

We all have things that weigh us down. Things that feel heavy on our hearts and heads. Sometimes they’re very personal. Family, relationships, finances, jobs, and life, in general, can be difficult to navigate at times. Some of the things that weigh on us are more general, or “big picture”. The big world events, historical events, political events, and third-world countries with terrible problems can be things that we feel helpless to change.

I struggle with the latter quite a bit. The “big picture” problems. I see the world, and this country specifically, repeating history. I see things that are very disturbing. Americans are very divided today and are looking for scapegoats.

When we, as people, look for “the other” to blame our problems on, things get bad. I see a lot of this going on today. That’s what my project is about; how death anxiety creates situations for humans to commit terrible acts. The knowledge that we are going to die motivates all of our activities, good and bad.

For me, art has always been a way to confront, address, or deal with issues that concern me. So when you struggle with problems, you can create something that addresses those concerns and maybe find some catharsis, or relief through making the art or even in the act (physical) of making it.

In fact, the physical act of making art does that for me. The content, ideas, or concepts are, of course, very important too. The final image or piece is what I consider the residue or evidence of this process. One of the reasons I work in these old, arduous photographic processes is to fulfill that physical need in creating art.

Technology is great. We all depend on it and it can be positive in a lot of ways. However, when it comes to art, it doesn’t work for me. I can’t sit at a computer and generate images and press a button to print them. It’s empty, mechanical, too perfect, too impersonal, there’s nothing physical and there’s nothing that connects me to the work.

I know there are people that really enjoy the digital stuff, computers, printers, etc., and feel satisfied making work that way. I just don’t connect. The old processes and the physical act of creating are where I find catharsis, relief, and some satisfaction that what I’m doing matters and has significance in the world.

“The Struggle” - a Whole Plate paper negative (Greenlaw) on Clearprint paper.

Verbascum thapsus

THE GREAT MULLEIN
Native Americans utilized it for ceremonial and other purposes, as an aid in teething, rheumatism, cuts, and pain. It's also used for a variety of traditional herbal and medicinal purposes for coughs and other respiratory ailments.

The Great Mullein - Plate #116 - Whole Plate Palladiotype from a wet collodion negative.

Humans Need to Create Illusions

Ernest Becker wrote about the “human animal” needing to create illusions in order to deal with the knowledge of our impending death. What does that mean? It means that out of all the life on this planet, humans are the only creatures that KNOW we’re going to die. That creates a huge psychological burden to bear.

Because we have this “memento mori” knowledge and it forces us to create what Becker calls “culture”. That’s the illusion of meaning and significance. We feed off of our “culture”. It’s external, not internal. We use it for our self-esteem. Self-esteem is a state of feeling like our lives have meaning and that we have significance. We’re both in awe of life and terrified of it as well.

If you deep dive, you can figure this out. I know these theories are difficult to wrap your head around, but they are incredibly powerful when you do.

Everything around us has been created as a type of distraction or illusion to keep our death anxiety at bay. All human activity is driven by death anxiety. Or, a better way to say it is, that all human activity is in service of keeping our death anxiety at bay. We all participate, no one is without this burden.

Without these illusions, we would be curled up in the corner, unable to function. Completely paralyzed from facing the reality of our existence. It is terrifying. To think that we are simply frail, weak animals that will decay, die, and be forgotten seems unbearable. Arthur Rimbaud said, “The only unbearable thing is that nothing is unbearable.” I think he was fully aware of our human condition.

The Great Mullein plant with the east morning light - September 5, 2022. Whole Plate wet collodion negative.

The Great Mullein plant going into flower - September 5, 2022. Whole Plate wet collodion negative. This is inverted - not printed. Will print these tomorrow.

The Great Mullein plant going into flower - September 5, 2022. Whole Plate wet collodion negative.

Calotype (paper negative) - Three Aspens - inverted.

Calotype (paper negative) - Three Aspens - inverted. I used Crob ‘Art paper to make this negative, I may try to print it on the same paper.

Calotypes (Paper Negatives) & Kallitype Prints

This is something that you don’t see every day in the photography world (historic photographic processes). A calotype (paper negative) and a kallitype (an old-school printing process). Both mean “beautiful” in Greek - “kalli” or “calo”.

The paper negative, invented by Fox Talbot (1800-1877), was patented in February 1841. Talbot called it, the “Calotype” of “Beautiful Type”. It was the first negative/positive process invented, Sir John Herschel coined the term, “photography” - “photo” (light) and “graphy” (writing). "Writing with light”.

It’s no secret that I have a passion for photography. The historic processes are so interesting to me and the history of photography in general. I’ve worked in almost every process from 1839 - 1980. My greatest interest is in the negative/print processes. There is nothing like a beautiful negative printed well.

As I work on my project (“In the Shadow of Sun Mountain”), I try to stay open to new ideas. Both technically and conceptually.

Over the past couple of months, I’ve been collaborating with Tim Layton of Tim Layton Fine Art. We’ve been working through some old printing processes from the late 19th century together. We were reviewing some information in a book called, “Coming Into Focus” by John Barnier and Tim was asking about the Calotype recipes and methodologies in the book. One thing led to another and I found myself making some Calotypes over the past few days. It’s been a lot of fun.

I first made Calotypes when I lived in Europe (2008-2009). I had an interest in exploring the pictorial look and feel but ended up using wet collodion for my work there. They are a lot of work, but what isn’t that’s worth anything today? I can see the possibility of adding to the project with some Calotype/Kallitype work. Like I said, I try to stay open to everything as it applies to creating a body of work. The danger is running down too many rabbit holes and never making the work. I know people who have spent decades perfecting a photo process and they have nothing to say with it - it’s heartbreaking and sad to see that happen. Don’t become a “process photographer” be an artist, create, express, think, connect, and tell stories. That’s our purpose.

The negative (Calotype) and print (Kallitype). The Great Mullein - September 3, 2022.

Taking A Deeper Dive Into My Concept - The Denial of Death

“Art is crucial for transforming death and pain into forms that can in some way enhance the life that remains.” 
- Robert Jay Lifton

Making Art is difficult. It’s a moving target. No one can just sit down one day and write out a concept, plan, and execute it all without changes, transformation, etc. And sometimes there are major changes to the ideas and concepts. Maybe even to the work. How it’s made, what it’s made with, etc.

As you make work, it reveals something to you. It reveals direction and purpose. But the heart of the work revolves around meaning.

“Deer Antlers” Plate #102. Whole Plate Palladiotype from a wet collodion negative.

As I make prints and live with these images my mind is changing the course of the concept of the work. I’ve been thinking about my project in terms of death anxiety lately. If you ever get a chance, watch my YouTube show called, “Dr. Sheldon Solomon, Death Denial & Artists, Terror Management Theory - Death Anxiety, Ernest Becker“. I was fortunate enough to have Dr. Sheldon Solomon on as a guest and we talked about all of this stuff. He co-authored a book called. “The Worm at the Core: On the Role of Death in Life”. It’s a book about Terror Management Theory (TMT). It’s basically Becker’s theories put to the test. In other words, Solomon and his colleagues test Becker’s theories in real life. Do we act differently toward people who are different when we are reminded of our mortality? What’s the driving force behind all human activity? Why do we start wars? Why do we commit genocide? Etcetera, etcetera.

This is what my project is slowly bringing forward. The more I think about these ideas and re-read the books I have, the more I move toward this as a main theme of the work.

I’ve studied Becker and Solomon for a few years. I first read, “The Denial of Death” by Ernest Becker a few years ago. In it, he argues that “the basic motivation for human behavior is our biological need to control our basic anxiety, to deny the terror of death.” (Keen 1973). Becker suggested that a significant function of culture is to provide successful ways to engage in death denial. Becker also noted that the root of evil lies in the selfishness of human beings seeking to protect their own existence in the face of their mortality, which he regarded as an essential aspect of human nature. Recognizing such evil within human beings gave Becker concern about the future of human society.

It had a big impact on me. It influenced my photography in major ways. I realized the question that I had been asking for over 30 years was, “Why do people do the things they do?” I was asking the question specifically as it applies to marginalized communities and how they are treated. Graduate school helped a lot but Becker put it all in perspective for me.

I quickly learned that the knowledge of our impending death is the reason we treat the “other” (anyone different from us in any way) the way we do. Anyone who threatens our “hero systems” either needs to conform to our belief system or be eliminated. Becker describes the human pursuit of “immortality projects” (or causa sui), in which we create or become part of something that we feel will outlast our time on earth. In doing so, we feel that we become heroic and part of something eternal that will never die, compared to the physical body that will eventually die. This gives human beings the belief that our lives have meaning, purpose, and significance in the grand scheme of things.

If our system that keeps death anxiety at bay is challenged (our hero systems), we lash out and can do horrible things. Ernest Becker said, “Man cannot endure his own littleness unless he can translate it into meaningfulness on the largest possible level.” Some of these “systems” are good, but most are bad. Becker argued that the conflict between contradictory immortality projects/hero systems (particularly in religion) is a wellspring for the violence and misery in the world caused by wars, genocide, racism, nationalism, and so forth, since immortality projects that contradicts one another threaten one’s core beliefs and sense of security.

As a vehicle for the masses to act out their urge for heroism, Becker went as far as to characterize society as a “codified hero system, which means that society everywhere is a living myth of the significance of human life, a defiant creation of meaning".

I feel like I have a good grasp of these concepts. I believe them to be true and accurate too. They answer questions (and ask) about the human condition in ways that I’ve never thought about. These are some of life’s very big questions. And these topics are dense and sometimes disturbing to deal with.

Currently, my project is dealing with the Ute, specifically, the Tabeguache band that lived on the land where I live now. It’s about my process of dealing with what I feel about living on stolen indigenous land. I’m trying to connect the landscape, rock formations, medicinal plants, and symbolic objects to the people that once occupied this land and were dispossessed of it. What I’m really dealing with is the question of death denial and death anxiety.

Ernest Becker said, “What man really fears is not so much extinction, but extinction with insignificance. Man wants to know that his life has somehow counted, if not for himself, then at least in a larger scheme of things, that it has left a trace, a trace that has meaning. And in order for anything once alive to have meaning, its effects must remain alive in eternity in some way. Or, if there is to be a ‘final’ tally of the scurrying of man on earth—a ‘judgment day’—then this trace of one's life must enter that tally and put on record who one was and that what one did was significant.”

My work isn’t about history. It’s not even about the Ute/Tabeguache. It’s about the denial of death, our immortality projects, and how we act these beliefs out.

This history is just one example of death anxiety. I could spend the day with you and show several small (or large) examples of this psychology playing out in our lives. This is what this work is really about. The questioning of human motivation, activity, and behavior; this history, this land, these places, and these objects, are simply ideas or metaphors to communicate those questions. I’ll continue to work on it.

“Meadow Barley” Plate #88. Whole Plate Palladiotype from a wet collodion negative.

Pure Palladium Prints - Clean Edges? Or Not?

I wanted to see how I feel about masking off the paper and sensitizing only the image area and leaving clean edges. I did the “Sunflower” print freehand and used removable tape on the other two.

These are pure palladium prints (Palladiotypes). My negatives are perfect for this printing process. It is very expensive in comparison to Kallitypes or most any other silver or POP process, but I think the reward is worth it.

I’m going to live with these prints for a while and see if I like the “clean edge” approach or not. I know I do like the white space better. It tends to give the image some room. It feels good. I know there are a lot of folks that dislike the “brush stroke” look and like the clean edges better. And there are the other folks that love the brush strokes. To each their own.

“Ponderosa Pine Stump Decomposing”. Whole Plate Palladiotype.

“Sunflower” Whole Plate Palladiotype.

Sunflower was used in many ways throughout the various American Indian tribes. Seed was ground or pounded into flour for cakes, mush or bread. Some tribes mixed the meal with other vegetables such as beans, squash, and corn. The seed was also cracked and eaten for a snack. Native Americans commonly used the sunflower in their summer festivals to symbolize the harvest and its bounties and was often associated with the sun and fertility.

New Book Prototype Work: Palladiotypes & Text Images

I spent almost all day today (my day starts early) making prints for my new book. I guess I should say, making prototypes for it. I’m in the process of figuring out what process I want to use, what format (size of book) I want to make and how I want to present the text.

These examples are getting very close to what I’m looking for. I left the old-school Kallitypes today and opted to work in a pure palladium printing process. I heated my potassium oxalate to 190F (88C) and got a very beautiful warm tone on the Revere Platinum paper.

The text plates are wet collodion Half Plate images. I processed them the same way. I’m very happy with the look and feel of the text. I mentioned in my last post I was going for a “weathered leather” look. I think I got it. I really like the artifacts and the raw look of them.

Every day, I get closer to getting a workflow that I can make several books with. Once I decide on everything, I’ll lock it down and only work in the selected printing process for the coming year or two. It will help me with making the rest of the work too. How to expose the negatives, how to process them, etc. All are very valuable for consistency. I don’t want contamination or confusion in chemistry. That’s why I’m working toward getting this figured out so I can keep making negatives for the project. It’s a process and I really enjoy the journey. It will take me several months to make one book. It’ll be a slow and demanding process for sure. I’m very grateful to be able to do this work. It’s unique and interesting (at least to me). I think history will be kind to me for doing it. I hope you can appreciate it too.

Plate #105 - Aspens. Palladiotype prints. Palladium is a wonderful (noble) metal!

Handmade Book: In the Shadow of Sun Mountain

Now that I’m approaching 120 negatives/plates of this work, I decided it was time to fit in some prototype work for the book. Get a plan together so I’m ready when the project is complete. I got a taste of what it might look like and feel like. I also tried some gold toning on the old Kallitype process.

Here you see all of the prints and a sheet of vellum on my cutting table.

Since this book will be made of original prints, I wanted to include the text in some non-digital, non-offset web press way. I suppose you could argue that I printed the paper from a word file and that breaks the chain. However, the print is a photograph from a wet collodion negative. If my handwriting was better, I would write the text by hand. For now, this is an interesting and non-commercial printing way to address this work. And I think it looks very nice. It fits.

The negatives for making the prints. I used lithograph tape to clean up the edges. These are wet collodion negatives. The text is on Half Plate.

If you can imagine 40 handmade prints, each with a page of text. The text won’t be exhaustive, maybe a paragraph or just a sentence. In between the print and the text is a sheet of vellum bound in to protect both pages. That makes the book 80 pages plus the 40 sheets of vellum. And I know that I’ll have four or five prints of text for my statement. Let’s say 85 pages total plus the 45 sheets of vellum. That’s a considerable body of work.

I really like this “fuzzy” text. How did it happen? The litho tape raised the glass off of the paper just slightly. I can control how much, or none at all (see the other example). This was my first test. This is an old school Kallitype and no toning. I like the other output but with this text. Will run one tomorrow and see.

What a beautiful book this will be!!! I’m beyond excited! It motivates me to work hard before winter comes.

I hope to make a total of five books. I will keep them as uniform as possible, but the nature of the work makes each one unique, and “one-off”. Art wrapped in art. Yes, the content will be the same, but my hand will vary. It will make the work human or unique. I like that.

Looking At Photographs: Plate #112 and Plate #113

We all bring something to a photograph. When we look at photographs, we project our our experiences onto the image. Our life filters determine whether or not we like the image, or we’re ambivalent about it. What we know about a photograph helps a lot. That’s when we can start putting what we’re looking at into context.

Context is crucial when viewing a photograph. I always say without context, it’s like opening up a 300 page book to page 150. How can you know what’s going on. Or you start watching a 2 hour movie after the first hour. You just wouldn’t get the story. Photography is no different. Context and intention are key to understanding what the artist is saying or expressing.

Plate #113 - “Baby Ponderosa Pine” - Whole Plate toned Kallitype from a wet collodion negative.

Plate #4 Ponderosa Pine Tree - Dry Collodion Negative & Old Kallitype Process

There are so many options to explore when you have collodion negatives. I think what most people miss when they’re only making positives (Tintype and Ambrotypes) is the wide range of prints you can get from a good negative.

The old Kallitype process post development, pre-clearing. All of the chemistry is different or used differently in comparison to the modern version of the process.

Lately, I’ve been exploring the old Kallitype processes. The modern version is a great alternative to Platinum Palladium as far as cost, but there are some drawbacks. I’ve made a lot of prints (the modern version) and find while they are beautiful, the original processes have a special something about them, starting with color. There seems to be more detail in the mid-tones as well. I’m going to do more testing, but I do know that Palladiotypes and Kallitypes are my “go-to” printing processes for this work.

Next year, I’ll be making a book of this work. It will involve printing the selected images on Revere Platinum paper and then binding the images with a page of text and a sheet of vellum between the print and text page. The book will be 40 images (roughly), 40 pages of text, and 40 pieces of vellum. Roughly 80 pages and vellum bound together (a lay-flat style) and then a cover put on it. The book will be 11” x 14” (28 x 36cm) I have high hopes of making five of these books over the coming years.